Oscar time

This year, I know one of the Oscar nominees. Well, by "know," I mean, "I am an acquaintance of." Jason Reitman, nominated for Juno, is a college friend of my dear friend, Todd. The two of them attended USC together. Now, Todd is a creative executive at Jason's production company, Hard C.

There's is a great story - one that deserves more than just a brief mention - of me meeting Jason in the Spring of 1998. It was my first trip to Los Angeles and I was going to hang out with Todd. Strangely enough (and this would on subsequent trips), it rained the entire time I was there.

The trip was pretty incredible. I performed with Todd's college improv troupe, went to a few shows at the Groundlings, and tore up the town as best as two under-21 kids could do. After on of the shows at the Groundlings, Jason asked us if we wanted to go over to the Universal lot. At the time, Jason's father, Ivan Reitman, had offices there. Of course, we said yes.

Again, the full story is for another time, but we basically got an incredible backstage tour of the lot. We rode around on golf carts at 3:00a, got hassled by security, ate a bunch of candy, saw the Back to the Future clock tower. For Jason, this was old hat; for us it was amazing.

Anywho, the trip ends and I go back to Chicago. Jason and I keep in touch on AOL instant messenger. I guess the old AOL IM client auto-saved chat transcripts. When pouring through an archival disk from an old computer system I came across this transcript. The date on it is 3/31/98 - just shy of ten years ago.

At one point in the chat, Jason makes a reference to the Oscars. If he wins on Sunday, we may get to see this actualized.

Ed. notes: I've replaced the instant messenger screen names to protect the possibility that they may still be in use. And I've done my best to keep formatting, spelling, and grammar intact. Some content has been removed. The Robert DeNiro reference at the beginning is due to the fact that some people think I resemble DeNiro.


Seidner/Jason Reitman 3/31/98 6:11p CST

Justin (6:11:51 PM): Hi Jason, this is Justin.

Jason (6:12:59 PM): Justin? Texan Justin? Little Bobby Deniro Justin?

Justin (6:13:07 PM): That's me.

Jason (6:13:31 PM): Man those buddy charts really work fast huh?
Jason (6:13:40 PM): You scared the crap out of me.

Justin (6:14:01 PM): I'm sorry. This im thing is scary, I guess. That little "
Justin (6:14:10 PM): ring" can be frightening.

###

Jason (6:14:22 PM): I just got an e-mail about a virtual girlfriend... have you heard about it?

Justin (6:14:48 PM): no. what is it?

Jason (6:15:43 PM): It's a program that treats you like a boyrfriend... I guess it yells, nags, and makes you pay for dinner
Jason (6:16:02 PM): that would be a funny sketch

Justin (6:16:44 PM): that's pretty interesting, you could even get into some kind of virtual abuse and reconciliation, kids, parents. Like those virtual pets that you have to feed and stuff.
Justin (6:17:03 PM): The Family for the guy on the move (or travelling or in the military).

Jason (6:17:35 PM): Guy: Hey how are you?PC: where's my fucking ring?Guy: how about a back massage?PC: How about some fucking flowers asshole
Jason (6:18:54 PM): You know as a sketch...

Justin (6:19:20 PM): nice, it's a good idea. The slogan could be something like, "All the rewards of family life, but can be anhiliated by the press of a button."

Jason (6:19:33 PM): Nice.

###

Ed. note: at this point, a friend of Jason’s sends me an instant message. I get sent on a run-around trying to figure out who it is.

Jason (6:59:39 PM): Hey, I just got this e-mail that somone named (Screenname removed) has been harrasing aol users and if she IM's you, you're supposed to turn her in. Crazy huh?

Justin (7:00:12 PM): curious. I just got im'ed by (Screenname removed).

Jason (7:00:23 PM): are you shitting me?

Justin (7:00:50 PM): nope. But I get like 10 new im's a day, most of which I have no idea who they are.

Jason (7:01:07 PM): Dude, what did she say?

Justin (7:01:47 PM): Just like, "Hi, how are you?" And I'm always like, "Sorry, you're not ringing any bells." Then we played the guessing game for a few minutes.

Jason (7:02:26 PM): She didn't say anything about I know where you live, is your five year old son home?

Justin (7:03:25 PM): no, nothing of the sort. did she im you?

Jason (7:03:46 PM): IT's (Name removed)... come on man

Justin (7:04:04 PM): that's what I thought. She said guess, and I was like, (Name removed)?
Justin (7:04:12 PM): and she was like, "Nope, guess again."

Jason (7:04:16 PM): what did she say?3.
Jason (7:04:25 PM): LOL

Justin (7:04:32 PM): Well, she said that I touched her, in many ways.
Justin (7:04:48 PM): I asked if (Screenname removed) was a Middle Eastern name, she said no.

Jason (7:04:53 PM): What the... I'm going to kill her

Justin (7:05:22 PM): look, some people just don't know of the pimpological powers that my small frame carries.

Jason (7:05:33 PM): lol.

Justin (7:05:37 PM): I did get my masters in Pimpieval studies.

Jason (7:05:43 PM): how many times have you used that one?

Justin (7:05:53 PM): Pimpieval?

Jason (7:06:08 PM): pimpological powers that my small frame carries.

Justin (7:06:37 PM): A couple of times, mainly in the developing of a sketch about pimps. Pimps fascinate me. Chris Rock's new book (awesome!) has a hillarious section on pimps.

Jason (7:07:42 PM): Really... I've been thinking of changing my name to pimp
Jason (7:07:52 PM): Ladies and gentleman, Pimp Reitman

Justin (7:08:49 PM): Most people only see the negative connotations that "Pimp" carries. The only people that recognize Pimp as an acceptable name are English Literature Scholars, but they think I'm saying Pip.
Justin (7:09:25 PM): Pimp Reitman would be pretty cool. When I go to this restaurant in Houston that takes names for reservations, I always give Pimp, it's so fun to hear it over the speaker.

Jason (7:10:08 PM): LOL
Jason (7:10:47 PM): I've always wnated to name a film of mine "going home in a new car" so if it wins an oscar, they'd say... and the winner is... going home in a new car

Justin (7:13:04 PM): You could totally wean a car out of the Academy, why not name it, "Going to Get Some Action Aonight." or "The Greatest Sex-Machine In the World."
There's a band called "Free Beer," so their flyers attract a nice crowd, but then there are just a bunch of angry sober people ... so their motor skills are much more in tune.

Jason (7:14:09 PM): You've got to wonder about the quality of a band named free beer
Jason (7:14:33 PM): I'm going to name my band Free Hooch

###

Jason (7:16:27 PM): I'm going to go now. Try to write
Jason (7:16:34 PM): I'll see you later

Justin (7:16:46 PM): Catch you later.

Jason (7:16:50 PM): bye

Justin (7:16:53 PM): bye

--end--